Posted by Sean C on Jun 13th, 2008
This week, we’ve got a special “This Week in Stupid” – an all sports edition! Famous sportscaster Jim McKay of The Wide World of Sports passed away early this week at age 86, and in his honor, we devote this edition of This Week in Stupid to, as McKay famously put it, The Agony of Defeat!
We begin this week touching on performance enhancers in Major League Baseball. This week, the New York Daily News reported that Roger Clemens and other athletes have been using a new kind of legal drug to boost their abilities – Viagra. That’s right, the little blue pill adds more pop in so many other ways, including better blood-flow and an increase in testosterone. If the game goes beyond four hours, though, seek immediate medical attention. Clemens merits the top spot in this story because he kept his stash in his locker at Yankees Stadium, and couldn’t quite keep it secret. Besides artificially extending his career a few extra months, I’m sure his use of Viagra led to some of the most awkward moments in the locker room.
Stupid Level – 7 – The Rocket needed help to blast off, but left his fuel out in the open.
Staying with baseball, Milton Bradley, currently leading the American League in batting average, charged the announcer’s booth of the Kansas City Royals. Ironically, Bradley went off after the KC announcing team dissed him for his inability to control his temper. The player was stopped just twenty feet away from his target, and was pulled back down to the field. But he just wanted to go up and “talk” with the broadcasters. Sure, talk, beat them into a pulp, you know how it is. It should be interesting to see what kind of punishment Bradley faces for this incident.
Stupid Level – 8 – When you prove someone right when you’re trying to prove them wrong, well, you’re either unlucky or a moron. In this case, Bradley got the best of both worlds this time.
Finally, we end in the NFL with Cedric Benson, former running back for the Chicago Bears, who was busted five weeks ago for drunk driving, and busted again this week for drunk driving. Despite fessing up to committing a crime, he actually says he thinks he didn’t do anything illegal. Wha? Oh, and the Bears cut him from the team for it.
Stupid Level – 9.5 – Stupidity cost this man his job, along with his lucrative income. Nobody’s picked him up yet, and it’s not looking good that Benson will play again in the NFL anytime soon. That’s what you get for not learning.
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Devin de Gruyl
June 13, 2008 at 2:59 pm
As much as I would love to take some joy (call it schadenfreude if you must) in Clemens’s fall from grace - I had him pegged for a self-absorbed, egotistical ass all the way back in ‘86, and it wasn’t just because I was a Met fan in a state that was largely a part of Red Sox Nation - I just can’t bring myself to feel anything but worn out by all the allegations seemingly breaking daily about the Rocket.
And to all those who would feel sorry for Clemens in this drama: Remember, folks, he brought all of this on himself when he outright denied ever “knowingly” taking steroids, and basically daring anyone to come up with whatever dirt they may care to find about him.
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